I had a conversation with two friends this weekend and the topic of the British monarchy came up.  One said that these figureheads served little purpose and that kings and queens were things of the past and were essentially not worth the British taxpayers’ money.

But I begged to differ. I think the function of the figurehead is every bit as important as a placebo in medicine. Placebos may not contain an active chemical substance, but  make people feel better, stronger, safer and even happier. Placebos and figureheads both contain the magical power of belief. Let me explain.

The word placebo is Latin “to please” and has also been defined as “to flatter” or “to play” and although it carries with it a negative connotation, it is by now a well-established fact that placebos relieve pain and facilitate healing perhaps due to classical conditioning or expectancy.  If you believe something is going to help you, it probably will help you, whether that’s a sugar pill or the real thing.

The mind is a powerful mechanism and if the mind believes in something, the body will follow.  The main reason that many people are willing to spend a small fortune on vitamin pills is because they believe that they will help you feel better, live longer, sleep better, et cetera. And one of the primary functions of a general practitioner is to give the patient the reassurance that nothing is wrong with them. The moment the doctor says “there is nothing to worry about,” the pain evaporates into thin air. This is the power of the mind and the power of belief.

The reason corporations spend more on advertising than on research and development is that long ago they realized that the public’s belief in a brand is far more important than whether their product is actually superior to the competitors.

To bring this into practical focus, let me give you two simple personal examples. Why do I always buy Tide laundry detergent?  Do you think I have any idea whether Tide is better than all the other brands of detergent? No way. I just believe this is a good product.  I have seen many ads on television which tell me this is so. Therefore I believe it.

Why do I think anything manufactured by Burt’s Bees is a healthy, organic, wonderful product?  Because I like the way the packaging looks, that’s why.  The look of the packaging of Burt’s Bees makes me a true believer. And I am certain that if I were to actually buy let’s say a Burt’s Bees Lip Balm, I would be as happy as a lord with the results. Thank God I am way too cheap to spend my money on lip balm.

Let’s say you don’t spend your time buying laundry detergent or looking at Burt’s Bees products. Say you’re an athlete, a professional golfer perhaps, and have a need to make it onto the PGA Tour.  If you have the money, and the time, you will be flying down to see one of the big name golf instructors not because you have proof that they will actually teach you better than local guys but because you believe they will. You believe in their far superior brand.

And so it is with monarchs in Britain. The king and queen have nothing to worry about.  People have a need to idealize things and to believe that these admired objects will make them safe and secure and happy and healthy. The British have his Majesty Charles III and thus  have peace and safety and happiness and good health.

As for us in America, what we have is CVS, vitamins, Burt’s Bees, and numerous other products to purchase in order to make us feel peaceful, safe and happy and healthy.  I bet we spend more on our placebos than the Brits spend on the monarchy.  In other words, good luck charms actually can work if you believe in them strongly enough. The Brits have the king, Tiger Woods has his red shirts and  the Irish have the four-leaf clover.

Or as the Mets would say: “You gotta believe.”